BLAHamas

I took a 6-day cruise to the Bahamas with my parents, brother, and uncle’s family. I’ve come to the conclusion that it will probably be another three decades before I take another cruise—by the second day I had stopped eating meat and by the third I stopped taking the elevator. By the fourth, I actually ran laps around the ship. If I had known it would have been so dreadfully boring, I would not have gone and saved my parents the money. As a result, I missed a hair appointment, a week of RPing, the arrival of my new Macbook (which I’ve decided to christen “Nigel” but more on that after I’ve seen it—Harry Potter fans will probably get it sooner rather than later, but only if you’re a diehard) and the opportunity cost of working.

So why was it so dreadful? Let me count the ways…

1. Cancellation of 2 of the 4 port destinations

Screw you, NCL, really. Time ashore was the most fun—we went to Kennedy Space Center down in Florida and then went on an underwater excursion in Nassau. The time spent on the boat was dreadfully dull, second-rate entertainment in all aspects. Sure, this behemoth of a floating hotel had everything—a library, an art gallery, a nightclub, a casino, spa, a theatre—but I’m from New York, it does not compare. All there was to do was eat, eat and eat. And damned if I didn’t gain weight. I don’t really mind gaining weight, to be fair, but I definitely do mind having to spend the money to purchase new jeans and skirts, which is already a chore for me as is.

We were meant to be compensated for these 2 cancellations, $50 per cabin to be spent on board (not even per person!) which is pretty paltry considering what they saved on port fees. They were doing some maintenance and instead of going to a private beach or whatever we ended up staying overnight in Nassau, which is nice, sure, except for those extra 12 hours NOTHING IS OPEN. As a result, we were forced to spend three full days at sea and that’s not counting nights in between destinations. Grouchy, grouchy Faye, who was told to leave all her electronics at home… so no iPod, no computer, no mobile…

2. My own austere lifestyle

I’m at a point in my life where I am willing to pay (quite a bit) for things I need or like, but otherwise I see no reason to waste the money. I don’t mind roughing it out on someone’s floor, I just need a clean, safe place to sleep. I don’t need room service, I know how to make my own bed, I can feed and clean up after myself. I don’t have a problem with hunting for a restaurant in the local area—that’s actually one of my favourite things to do. A lot of people on the ship were elderly or overworked and I’m sure they appreciated all these extra services, but I didn’t.

At this point I am also hugely impatient and it felt like the whole trip was spent WAITING for something. There were lines to everything—lines to get on and off the boat, lines to dinner, lines lines lines… I hate lines, if you couldn’t tell?

3. Destination and personal tastes

Looking back on reason #1, I probably would have enjoyed—or at least not found the trip so damn tedious—if those destinations weren’t cancelled. Sure they gave us the option of opting out, but after my dad and uncle already took time off for vacation, you don’t just cancel two weeks before the trip.

But Uncle Yao said it best when I refused for the umpteenth time to go to the pool: the Carribbean is probably not the best vacation destination for me, personally. A cruise on the Mediterranean is for people who like to explore cities, museums and historical monuments (ME), a cruise to the Carribbean is for people who like the beach, swimming or tanning, what my uncle called “relaxing.” Points of note:

•  I hate swimming, I never learned properly but I know enough to stay afloat and save myself, that’s about it. Also, I care far too much about my hair to have it ruined.
• I hate tanning.
• Spending long periods of time outside in the sun is not “relaxing”! It’s too hot, and all I’d be doing is reading, which I can do inside where it’s nice and cool and quiet. Plus, I hate the feel of sunscreen. There are only two activities worth putting on sunscreen for, and they are frisbee and sailing.

Next time, if I ever go back to the Carribbean, I’m getting Jason to take me around in a sailboat. I don’t need the excessive luxury of a cruise ship.

4. Travel companions

Don’t get me wrong, I love my family, I do. But we spent far too much time together on this trip, and we were all in the same room. With nothing else to do and nowhere else to go (see reasons above), you can imagine how often I hid in the ship’s crappy library. There’s really only one kind of person I could imagine spending all that time with on a cruise ship, and what we’d be doing I wouldn’t exactly want to mention in front of my family… so…

As aforementioned, I’m really the oddball among all of us, as in, I’m the only person who has a decent sense of adventure. I would have loved to go clubbing or para-gliding or something, but that’s not something you do with your parents. Also, I so wanted to go to the Pirate Museum and get my hair braided in Nassau but nobody else was interested. Sigh.

So all I did this week was eat. Eat! And I don’t eat that much.

There were some highlights, mainly the excursions ashore, and there was a really great History of Magic lecture and a Close-Up magic show the last two days (even if the lecturer talked too damn much), but I was so antsy to return.

Extra note, NCL, your shampoo sucks. REALLY SUCKS.

Pictures after the jump. more »

even if I like to forget it sometimes

Normally public displays of affection on the subway make me roll my eyes and gag, the two people involved are obnoxious and willing to let the world observe it so. This morning, bleary-eyed and half-awake, I saw this couple that gave me a little tingle in my toes.

She was perhaps of Middle Eastern descent – perhaps Lebanese – she had that lovely texture and curl to her hair I’ll keep trying to attain but never will. Her face was pale, not film-star beautiful but compelling enough to warrant a second look. And they were standing close to each other, close because they wanted to and not because the space in the compartment required it. And her boyfriend or whoever kind of nestled her against his chest; I remember him more distinctively because he had dreadlocks and a five-o’clock shadow and a shirt that said “Remember Your Roots.”

The scene I’ve described probably isn’t out of the ordinary, and frequenters of the subway will have seen it before. I know I have many times, but there was something about their posture and movements that seemed so natural, yet at the same time intimate, that I hope they didn’t catch me looking. It was obvious that they didn’t care who was watching them, but it still felt a bit like intruding.

When a seat freed up he guided her to it and had her sit down, and he hovered above her clasping the rail over his head. He said something to make her smile and she threaded her fingers through the belt-loops of his jeans and pulled him in, just slightly.

It’s moments like these that make me sigh. I guess I am a romantic after all.